Number 300

On By scottpetersenIn 300 PostsLeave a comment

This is my 300th post.  When this whole blog thing started, I thought I might do it a few times and fold the tent.  Instead, I’ve been doing it  twice a week for 3 years.  I have some favorites:

Update — “Symmetrical Socks” (11/14/13) – I did go out and buy 15 pair of gold toe socks.  All the old ones went to rummage.  I love my sock drawer

Most Meaningful — “Today I Became a Grandfather” (12/28/11) – speaks for itself

Tear in my eye — “Oh Shenandoah” (8/14/11) – still prompts a tear

Best Jokes — The Brownie duo (11/29/12 and 12/2/12)

Editorial — I have written on numerous occasions. Teachers are wonderful.  But I despise the Chicago Teachers Union for its indifference toward education – especially for the poor and underprivileged 

Best Recipe — “Donna’s favorite Meal” (10/28/11)

Most Inspirational — “Thank you Captain” (5/28/12)

Most Interesting — “Gabriel” (1/30/12)

Best Travel Posts — The trio on South Africa (March 2013)

Personal Experience — A few – “Don’t You Like our Looks?” (12/1/13); “College” (10/13/13); “Protecting vs. Insulating Children” (11/21/13); “Riding with Joe Miller” (6/4/13)

The Best “Lesson” — Oh my there have been many.  You’ll enjoy “True Confessions” (8/16/11) or “A 6th Grade Lesson” (11/23/11)

Quirkiest — “The Antique Crutch” (11/7/11)

For now, I’ll keep doing this and try to come up with interesting stuff.  300 posts.  Mercy.  That’s 3 tenths of a thousand.  1 ten thousandth of a million.  Next stop. . . .  301.

Three Donuts

On By scottpetersenIn Dinkel's Bakery, Three donutsLeave a comment

Breakfast for me is normally high fiber cereal and blueberries. Banana if I must. And frozen fruit in a pinch. And my coffee (which is better than any coffee I know).  I’ll have a donut once in a while. DoNUT. Singular. I haven’t had two donuts in one sitting for years. Three? In the words of Donnie Brasco “fugedaboutit.”    Until last week. 

On Thursdays, my office brings in bagels and pastries.  Last Thursday, I had the chance to sample an assortment of donuts and pastries from Dinkel’s Bakery in Chicago (see http://www.dinkels.com).  Now I don’t think that – in my life – I have ever seen a donut like a Dinkel’s donut.  Scout’s Honor.  I walked up to the box and peered in and my heart nearly stopped.  I quickly looked around to see if anyone was looking at me.  Then I stared back into the box.  Large.  Beautiful.  Pastries.  I reached down, peeled one up from the waxed paper and took a bite.  It was Mardi Gras in my mouth. 

Now if it was custom to simply stare at the donuts – and nothing else – it would have been one of those rare unique experiences which one has once in a lifetime.  Maybe like having a private audience with The Crown Jewels.  If one was blindfolded and could only eat the donut, the taste would catapult the sampler to heaven in an instant.  But to see – and taste – was a unique, cosmic experience.  And it’s one I will assuredly have again. . . .

Truth be told, I snagged three (count ’em) Dinkel’s donuts while no one was looking, sneaked them on a paper plate, brought them into my office, closed the door and devoured them for lunch.  It was like “ahhhhhhh” and I wanted to have a cigarette (and I don’t smoke) and take a nap . . . . .

Take One Step Back

On By scottpetersenIn Baggage carousels, Take one step back1 Comment

Six times in the last few months, I have arrived in airports – and had to get baggage from a baggage carousel. Standing at the baggage carousel can be mildly infuriating at times. People push their baggage carts right up to the conveyor and stand laconically.  Glassy-eyed.  Waiting.  Whole families including little kids press against the carousel.  All hovering over a segment of their temporary turf.  Everyone bellies up to the conveyor.  Then the buzzer goes off.  People press closer.  Peering down the line – is that mine?  That red one?  People grab a bag.  Turn it.  Nope.  Suddenly someone grabs a monster suitcase and swings it backward.  Yikes! 

I usually observe from a slight distance.  Not afraid to get in the mix but poised at some opening in the milling herd to grab my bag when I see it. 

It occurred to me that this whole process of recovering luggage could be made soooo much easier for everyone with a simple admonition:  take one step back.  Think about it.  If everyone took one step back at the carousel, they would still be able to see down the line at the oncoming stream of bags.  And at the appointed moment, step forward, grab the bag and whisk it away without endangering the knees of their brethren.  One step back.  That’s all it would take.  But then you have someone feeling entitled (there are more and more folks who feel that way – don’t get me started) who steps up to the conveyor.  And just stands there.  And the herd would follow.    

The Best Medicine

On By scottpetersenIn Aristophanes, Humor, The Best MedicineLeave a comment

On March 14, 2005, I delivered a paper to The Chicago Literary Club titled “The Best Medicine.”  The paper is a mildly academic study of the history, styles and benefits (even healing power) of humor. See http://www.chilit.org/Papers%20by%20author/Petersen4.htm   

Joseph Addison – the 17th Century English writer – said “man is distinguished from all other creatures by the faculty of laughter.”  Sigmund Freud in his The Joke and its Relation to the Unconscious states that “jokes” release us from traditional inhibitions which make up the veneer of our personalities.  Ol’ Sig’s book also contains a host of jokes, puns and one-liners. His book ain’t Planes, Trains and Automobiles but it’s worth a look. . . .  

Historically, the earliest known “smile” is etched on the lips of a statue of Ebbeh – a Mesopotamian factotum who lived in 2400 B.C. (Ebbeh now resides in the Louvre).  Four centuries later, we enter Biblical times.  While there were no Old Testament comedians, the word “laugh” (or “laughter”) makes its debut in the Book of Genesis.  When Abraham and Sarah are told they will have a son, both fall on their faces – laughing.  Perhaps that is why their son was named “Isaac” which in Hebrew is “He [or God] laughs.”  The word “laugh” or its derivations appear 43 times in the Bible (with only 6 of those in the New Testament).  The Koran chronicles 16 uses of the word but most relate to the faithful laughing at the inglorious fate of unbelievers.  The Veda in Hindu text records the word “laugh” 8 times.   In Buddhist tradition, he “Laughing Buddha” was supposedly a real person – a wandering happy Zen monk named Pu-Tai who lived around 1000 A.D. 

The first stand-up comedian was Aristophanes (see post of 8/28/11) who was known for his political jabs.  He would lurch out on stage smeared with wine playing the Emperor – Cleon.  It didn’t go over well with Cleon. . . . . The first joke book was The Philogelos (“Laughter Lover”) “published” in the 4th Century A.D.  It was a collection of 264 jokes.  One depicts a chatty barber.  “How shall I cut your hair” he says to his customer.  “In silence” the man responds.  Some things don’t change. . . . .    

I Don’t Get No Respect. . . .

On By scottpetersenIn I don't get no respect, Rodney Dangerfield1 Comment

My wife made me join a bridge club. I have to jump off next Tuesday.

When I was in high school, a girl called and said “come on over. Nobody’s home.” I went over to her house. Nobody was home.

My wife is such a bad cook, the flies chipped in to fix the screen door. The roaches hang themselves in the pantry. Most guys go home and get pot roast. I go home and get roast pot. Did you ever see meat loaf that glows in the dark?  In my house, we pray after the meal. . . .

Oh I miss Rodney Dangerfield (1921-2004). He was a classic (which may share a whisper about my sense of humor). Born Jacob Rodney Cohen in New York, he started writing for standup comedians at the age of 15 and began performing (as “Jack Roy“) when he was 20.  In the 1960’s he was performing stand up comedy at night and working as a salesman or singing waiter by day.  Nothing seemed to go right for him and he went deep into debt.  He came to realize that he needed a stage “image.”  Since nothing went right for him, the light went on over his head.   On March 5, 1967, The Ed Sullivan Show needed a last minute replacement and “Rodney Dangerfield” made his big debut.   And he was the hit of the show.  He was invited as a guest on The Dean Martin Show and then The Tonight Show – where he appeared on 35 occasions.  Rodney’s career peaked in the 1980’s when he appeared in the iconic movie “Caddyshack” and several other films (including “Easy Money” and “Back to School“). 

In 2001, he suffered a minor heart attack backstage at The Tonight Show.  And his health began to slide.  In August 2004, he entered the hospital for a heart-valve replacement.  When someone asked how long he’d be in the hospital, he responded “if all goes well, a week or 10 days.  If not, then maybe an hour and a half.”  He died a short time later – at 83 – and was buried in Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery.  His headstone reads “There goes the neighborhood.” 

Check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9FPv2toi5og for a laugh (and the many others alongside) 🙂

A Hero

On By scottpetersenIn A Hero, Bridget Brown, Courage, Malala2 Comments

In my post of February 7, 2013, I spoke of the courage of 17 year old Malala Yousafzai — the young woman from the Swat Valley of Northern Pakistan who stood up to the evil of Taliban oppression, was shot (and nearly died) and now continues to speak out all over the world — on behalf of women and young girls. Malala is a Hero (with a capital “H”).

At Church on Sunday, I heard another Hero speak. Her name is Bridget Brown. Bridget wears many hats.  She is a student, she mentors and teaches students with disabilities, she works as a dental assistant, she is a prolific public speaker and she does television commercials. Oh – and did I mention — Bridget has Down’s Syndrome?  Bridget’s presentation was captivating.  To say the least.  She is articulate.  Funny.  And compelling.  And she is an inspiration.  In her presentations, she urges her audience to see the abilities in those around us — not the disabilities.  And she asks listeners to be inclusive of those with disabilities – since we all share the same emotions, feelings and desire to be accepted, cared for and loved.  And perhaps because it was Sunday, at Church, Bridget talked of how Jesus seemed to spend  a fair amount of time with disabled people.  Helping them.  Healing them.  There is a lesson here. . . . . . 

Bridget’s website is http://www.butterfliesforchange.org  

The Lazy Face

On By scottpetersenIn Anything but chocolate, The Lazy Face, Trouble sleeping?Leave a comment

In my post of March 19, 2012 (“Trouble Sleeping?”), I talked about how I deal with the issue of trying to fall back to sleep in the middle of the night.  The one big thing for me (apart from “ABC” – see 2/6/14) is the “clenched hands” issue.  When I open and relax my hands, the rest of me starts to relax.  

But recently I’ve noticed another phenomenon that also keeps me awake.  When I am laying there – thinking of work, handyman projects (like us non-handymen do), cooking, writing this blog, etc. I come to the conclusion that my eyes – while closed – are squinting.   It’s almost like my face is screwed up when one is in deep contemplation.  So, I’ve been relaxing my shoulders and letting my jaw drop a bit to relax my face.  I think of it as adopting a “lazy face.”  And you know what?   It seems to work.  In combination with the 337 other things I do to relax while wide-awake at night, I’ve now added the “lazy face.”  And then of course there’s the “bent ear” phenomenon when I find myself laying on my pillow with my ear doubled over. . . . . .   

Parole

On By scottpetersenIn Parole1 Comment

On August 17, 1973, Ernie S  – an 18 year old with a lengthy rap sheet – broke into a home at 5009 South Ellis in Chicago where Susan Marie H was working as a graphic artist in a small studio in the home. Susan surprised Ernie while he was rifling through two purses in the dining room.  He picked up a large knife and stabbed her five times in the chest and stomach. She screamed and Ernie ran out. Susan’s friends in the other room came in and sat her at the kitchen table. She was doubled over and bleeding heavily. Officers who arrived on the scene realized there was no time for an ambulance. They picked her up and raced her to a hospital. Susan – age 23 – was DOA.

In 1976, I was 29 and a seasoned Assistant States Attorney in the Felony Trial Division. I handled a great number of murder cases and I remember details of many. But this one stands out.  It was a 2 week jury trial which I tried with my partner Chuck H.   The jury deliberated for an hour, Ernie was convicted and sentenced to 100 to 300 years (see post of 10/28/12).   

About 7 years ago, I had a call out of the blue from the State’s Attorney’s Office. “Mister Petersen, do you remember a home invasion/murder involving Ernie S__?” I said “yes” and provided graphic details.  The State’s Attorney who called me said “wow – you really do remember.” Of course. I will never forget.  Upon his election, State’s Attorney Richard Devine began asking former State’s Attorneys to participate in parole hearings.  On the bad cases.  I just testified for the third time on Wednesday.  Asking that Ernie never be released.  It is terribly emotional.  Susan’s parents both died a few years after Susan’s death.  Eight months apart.  They were in their mid-50’s.  Two of Susan’s siblings have died.  Why?  Grief.  Susan’s sister Pat has testified “you have no idea how suffocating the grief is when something like this happens to a family.”   

Ernie?  A few years after his conviction, he escaped from a prison van taking him to a hospital.  He ran into a Joliet high school, stormed into a classroom and dragged a 14 year old girl into a stairwell.  Police were minutes behind and he was recaptured. 

Neither the death penalty nor life without parole were available in 1976 but this is one case where either would have applied.  Instead remaining family members have had to argue against his release every few years.  Reliving the pain.  

So What Do We Do??

On By scottpetersenIn Foreign Policy, Poverty, Walter Lippmann, What do we do?Leave a comment

When I read of the tragedy unfolding in Syria, the intense suffering in Central Africa, the mind-numbing poverty and starvation in Sudan, the cruelties in North Korea and the violence around the globe, I have to wonder – what do we do (collectively or individually)?   When it comes to this mind-boggling conundrum, there are two choices:  do nothing or do something. 

In the “do something” realm, I thought about the options.  And I thought I would complile a list.  To ponder what kind of “something” might serve.  Regrettably, there are not many possibilities:

Military Intervention – Always an option but never a very good one 

Political Intervention – Getting involved in the local political process (nearly as bad as the military option unless it’s political “pressuring”)

Humanitarian – The “biggee.”  Supporting with time, talent or funds those organizations which provide food, shelter, medical assistance, education and support for the oppressed

Prayer – Always an option with no downside

Mobilizing Others – This includes just “spreading the word” about the issues.  Raising awareness.  Encouraging involvement.  Raising the prospects of meaningful contribution by our brethren (mainly in the “Humanitarian” area).  Lobbying

In Walter Lippmann’s classic work American Foreign Policy, he spoke of how in foreign policy the United States should be motivated only by “national interest” (see post of 5/3/12).  But is there a “national interest” in intervening in such situations?  Can a pressing humanitarian urgency trump national interest?   Actually, I see no inconsistency between the two except possibly in cases where national sovereignty is perceived as threatened (like North Korea).  Yet there is a clear limit on what we can  undertake – and accomplish.   I’d be interested in your “take” on what – if anything – “we” should do.  Or what more we can do.  As individuals.  Or as nations.      

Subsidiarity

On By scottpetersenIn Alexis de Tocqueville, Decentralization, SubsidiarityLeave a comment

When one purchases a defective product, there is usually a temptation to call the company that made it. And complain. And ask for money back or a replacement. Some folks announce that “I’m going to call the President of the company and give him [or her] a piece of my mind.”  Sometimes it works.  And the decision is justified.  But if the President says “sorry” – you’re fresh out of options. 

When I have an issue with a company (or product or organization or whatever), I try to accomplish at the lowest possible level that which I want accomplished.  If I start at the President of the company and he or she says “sorry kiddo,” there is no appellate court.  You’re fini.  S.O.L.  So when I have a problem, issue, complaint or rant — and I want something done — I start with the person who answers the phone.  It may be Debbie or John or Elmer or Bambi.  And I explain.  If they can’t help me, I say “may I speak to your supervisor please?”   And I go up the ladder.  Using this procedure, you get perhaps five bites of the apple instead of just one.  Recently an insurance question came up and it was resolved with the person who answered the phone. 

This methodology is called “subsidiarity.”  The premise is that a matter ought to be handled by the lowest authority capable of addressing the matter effectively.  It is a concept that has application in government as well.  Alexis de Tocqueville in his classic study Democracy in America spoke of subsidiarity in terms of “decentralization.”  Instead of constructing massive unwieldly federal programs, one allows local municipalities and citizens to deal with issues.  When you have a problem with your local grade school, do you go to the U.S. Department of Education or do you start with your child’s teacher? 

I think there is a lesson here. . . .