(AP Wilmette IL) Chicago lawyer Scott Petersen has a problem. His brain is slowly turning into chocolate.
After years of overindulging in Oreos, chocolate chip cookies, Hershey’s kisses, Hershey bars, Easter eggs, chocolate rabbits, frogs and sweets, Petersen’s brain is slowly but surely becoming a chocolate mass. A routine physical exam turned up this unique phenomenon last Tuesday. His doctor said “Mister Petersen’s cerebral cortex has already developed a 1/4″ layer of chocolate. I believe that his cerebellum and occipital area are now crusted with a 60% cocoa.”
In a few years, Petersen’s head will be filled with a commercial grade of bittersweet chocolate.
Petersen was interviewed in a local restaurant where he was dining with his wife Donna. “I think it’s silly. I eat pizza too and you don’t hear that my brain is turning into Mozzarella cheese” he said testily. Petersen then ordered a double “Chocolate Decadence” – the menu’s signature dessert. For his main course . . . . .
Once Petersen’s brain has become solid chocolate, his wife is expected to put him on display at a local museum on weekends. “Hey – I might as well get something out of this too” she said.
Petersen is, however, expected to continue practicing law. A solid chocolate brain is not expected to interfere with his duties or knowledge as an attorney . . . . .