Tell Me Who Your Friends Are

We all grew up somewhere. In a home. Most with parents who shared with us their love, emotion, beliefs, work ethic and family values. I was an only child with great parents who both worked from the time I was 8 years old. Mom was quiet and reserved. My Dad was a hero – deaf since World War II, he was a Boy Scout leader, Sunday school teacher and role model for me.

My Dad was the one who inspired me with my collections of stamps, coins, rocks, fossils, campaign buttons, magic tricks, autographs and such. And he was the one who would provide words of wisdom – which for me were well-needed.

The one saying that he repeated often – while looking me straight in the eye – was “Son, tell me who your friends are – and I’ll tell you who you are.” Soooooo. . . . I tried to hang out with good guys. Fellow Boy Scouts and high school pals. Today – I am ever so fortunate/lucky/blessed to have great friends from the varied chapters of my life (why they hang out with me – I’ll never know).

When it comes to the international community – look at the United States. And the countries who are our friends. Someone could write a book on the “why” we have such friends but for the most part they are democracies who share a respect for life. Liberty. And for the human condition. And America shares those values.

And then there’s Russia. Syria. North Korea. China. Iran. Venezuela. Despotic, tyrannical, despicable leadership. With an approach to government guided by abuse, aggression, domination and suppression. Enforced by incarceration and murder. And these guys are “friends” with each other(!). Go figure. . . . .

Friends

[A repeat from May 6, 2015]  Donna and I talked about “friends” while walking around the block with Daisy. Friends. We are blessed with many.  Some are those who read this post.  There are new friends. Old friends. Best friends.  There are a few friends in whom we can confide everything.  Or just about everything.  Friends we see or talk to every ten years (and we pick up where we left off) and those we talk to every day.  Think about it.  You have such friends too.  We all want friends.  Need friends.  BFF’s and just “friends.”  Guys we golf with.  People we work with.  Guys I see walking to the train station (“Hey John, howyadoin‘?”).  And of course there are spouses – and family – who are ever so special — a smidge above the BFF category.  

Friends are good for us according to studies.  Friends keep us healthy and happy.  Even add to longevity.  Friends make us smile, laugh and cry.  We cry when they leave us.  Yet many folks cry because they have no friends.  We are in a society where many people are sad, lonely or depressed.  That’s why our smiles and encouragement to all we meet can be so important.  As said before, the small things we do for others may mean nothing to us.  But it may mean everything to them. . . .   

I like the wry observation of Ralph Waldo Emerson that “It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them.”  Donna says that I take full advantage of that saying (“Scott – would you PLEASE take the lampshade off your head. . . . “).                  

5 Guys

When I was a kid, my father used to tell me – over and over – “Tell me who your friends are and I’ll tell you who you are.”  I think I learned.  We all want friends we like but more importantly, we want friends who are good for us.  Friends who enrich us.  Make us think.  Make us better.  I work with really good people.  And in my off hours, I try to hang around good people.   Really good people.  Smart people.  Good golfers.  🙂   I have a vague idea of who I am.  But the jury’s still out . . . . .

And I tend to view food the way I do friends.  I normally want food that’s good for me.  Food that likes me.  Food that’s not going to cause me trouble – if you get my drift.   I have avocados for breakfast (August 20, 2013) and Saturday lunches are pretty healthy (March 15, 2012).  Donna feels the same way about food.  It’s gotta be nutritious.  So dinner can be pretty boring. . . . .  

But on Friday night, the planets aligned.  The stars stood still.  Sages from ages past looked down.  And rubbed their chins.  Looked at each other.  Solemnly.  And gave the nod.  Donna’s been home recuperating from the hip replacement.  And Friday we had no plans for dinner.  I threw out “how about some burgers and fries from 5 Guys?”  I quickly ducked.  But no missile was forthcoming.  I looked.  Donna was rubbing her chin.  She looked up and said brightly “sounds good.”  Oh my socks and shoes.  I grabbed the keys and dashed off to 5 Guys before she could change her mind.  The last time we’d had 5 Guys was maybe four years ago.   I walked in and ordered.   Got the goods.  Burgers.  Dripping with onions, cheese, lettuce, tomato and ketchup.   Crisp greasy, salty fries.  And I returned home.  And we ate.  Slowly.  Seriously.  O’m’gosh it was delicious.  We looked at each other and resolved right then and there that we are going to do this again.  At least once a year. . . . .