Long ago, I had a year long course in the Japanese language. In addition to conversation, we studied the phonetic alphabet (hiragana) and to a lesser extent the Chinese characters (kanji) and characters used for foreign language translation (katakana ). While I can still offer the usual niceties, I can also reveal to people that I am the great blue-eyed legend (“watakushi wa seigen no hakuryuu densetsu“). Anywayyy. . . .

We all get robo calls. Spam. Unwanted nuisance calls. A regular for us is some pushy character who calls once a day from some sketchy “support” group. When I see the caller ID say “spam” or “robo” I will occasionally pick up the phone, pause and offer “go ahead.” And then hang up after the opening “Mister Petersen, I’m from the . . . . ” (click). It is normally advised not to say “Yes” (our words are likely recorded). Yesterday, the phone rang. I looked. “Spam.” So I decided to speak in a non-traditional manner. I answered the phone as you would in Japan. I adopted a higher pitched voice, picked up the receiver and whispered “moshi moshi.” There was a pause and I repeated louder – “moshi moshi.” At the other end, there was a cough and the deep voice just said “sorry – we’ll take you off our list” (click). Donna was standing right there and gave me a nod and wink. And we laughed! We’re off the list!!

So next time the phone rings and you look down and see “Spam,” you might try answering in Japanese (“moshi moshi“). Of course it could be embarrassing if it turns out to be your child’s 4th grade teacher. Or someone from the Nippon Foundation . . . .